Workplace conflicts are going to happen and the word “yes” can produce remarkable results to help your teams grow. In this Tough Things First podcast, Ray Zinn explores the toughest workplace conflicts and the “Yes Principle.”
Ray Zinn: Hi, Rob. Good to be with you today.
Rob Artigo: Sure. Let’s talk about creative teams and managing conflict because there’ll be differences of opinion. There’ll be different directions people want to go in concepts that they’re developing. There may just be personality conflicts. So in your experience, what kind of conflicts are the most common?
Ray Zinn: Well, there’s a stone wall, in other words, where neither side is willing to back down. The good example of that is currently we have the shutdown in the government, and it’s based over some very strong principles that neither side want to bend on.
If you have a conflict where neither side is willing to bend, you’re dead in the water. There’s a saying that said, “Blessed are the flexible for they shall not get bent out of shape.” So you have to be flexible in order to have conflict resolution. And currently, as we have the shutdown, there is no flexibility. They’re stonewall opposites, as you would, between the two views, and they’re willing to keep the thing shut down forever, it sounds like, because they’re just not willing to budge. So what I do is I go back to the yes principle. I find out where we do agree.
Where can we start with an agreement and then go from there. Currently, in the Congress, we appear to be stonewalled. In other words, there’s no flexibility. And so until somebody budges, until somebody is willing to be flexible, we’re going to get bent out of shape. And we are currently being bent out of shape because absolutely there’s no flexibility in the conflict. I start again with the yes thing. Where can we agree? I start there. And so I minimize conflict at Micrel by virtue starting about, okay, where can we agree? Where do we start with the agreement? And then come down to where can’t we not agree? It’s interesting if you can always go with an agreement where we say, “Yes,” you can resolve any conflict. It’s just when you can’t say, “Yes,” that you end up with this conflict. Whether it be between Russia and Ukraine over whether or not there’s going to be a dividing line on the part of the country that’s already been established by Russia and Ukraine, or whether we’re going to keep fighting over the same thing.
Right now, there’s a stalemate. Russia not appears to be moving any further and Ukraine is just holding the line, but they don’t want to give up that territory. So that’s another one where there is an unavoidable conflict that’s not going to get resolved until there’s some flexibility.
Rob Artigo: Are you a big believer in being proactive to take those conflicts and turn them into opportunities for growth and stronger relationships? I mean, is that really even possible? You said, “You get to the yes.” What can we agree on? Then is there a way to take it, not just even out or smooth out the conflict, but to find a way to grow and have stronger relationships?
Ray Zinn: You can grow through conflict. I mean, because, sir, when you break a bone, it grows back stronger. Not that you want to find conflict, you want to avoid it when you can, but when there is a conflict, be like a bone mending back together, make it stronger. Because when you start with a conflict, maybe it’s unavoidable conflict, and you start with this yes principle. You actually build a stronger organization because you’ve learned how to resolve conflicts because we’re always going to have them. As long as you have people with different personalities and different objectives, you’re going to have conflict, period. End of statement, you’re going to have conflict. So learning to deal with conflict is like learning to deal with a broken bone. You learn how to mend it and mend it stronger. So I believe that by not avoiding, well, avoiding conflict if you can, but if you can’t, don’t just slam the door.
Try to find out how you can be flexible and how you can grow from that conflict. If you look at sports, you got two different teams, both of them want to win. And so there’s going to be conflict as you would, penalties and all kinds of things that are going to happen during the game, but we expect those. And it’s the teams that can resolve those conflicts that win, even in sports. So having less penalties, having less turnovers and so forth just makes you a stronger and better team. You want to avoid conflict if you can, obviously, but if you can’t, like in a football game or some other sports, learn to deal with it. Learn to deal with conflict.
Rob Artigo: Ray, the listeners can join us and continue the conversation and their education at toughthingsfirst.com. You can get a dose of Ray’s daily wisdom there and also on X, Facebook and LinkedIn. And of course, Ray’s books are out there, Tough Things First and the Zinn of Zinn Series 1, 2, and 3. The Essential Leader is out there on Amazon. Is a bestseller, 10 Skills, Attributes, and Fundamentals That Make Up the Essential Leader. Thanks, Ray.
Ray Zinn: Thanks, Rob.
